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Tag: autism parenting

peaches cut up into a bowl of cream

The Peaches and Cream Autism

Years ago, my autistic daughter participated in what they called a special needs sporting event. I was quietly cheering her on, and another parent asked, “What is she doing here? Helping?” I shook my head and explained that she, too, was playing as a child with a disability.

“What’s wrong with her?”

“Nothing is wrong with her. She just has autism.”

The other parent’s eyes glazed over as she remarked, “Not the real autism. She has the ‘peaches and cream’ autism.”

I gave no response.

This brief, somewhat painful interaction has stuck with me for more than a decade. First, the image of peaches and cream as it relates to levels of perceived heightened ability makes no sense. Second, the inner workings of the mind and body are generally difficult to observe because they are not overt. So those with the perceived simple “peaches and cream” autism seem to have no place. They are too visibly able to fit in with those who have overt disabilities, and too invisibly disabled to seamlessly connect with nondisabled peers.

Where do we land?

Unpacking the Peaches

Over the years, I’ve ruminated on the peaches and cream autism statement, and I have repeated the nonsensical phrase many times. Sometimes in an effort to try to figure it out; sometimes in an effort to gauge other’s understanding. Results were mixed.

My younger, non-autistic daughter, much like me, was trying to unpack the concept.

And she did, in a way that finally made sense. She being a mere 15 years old, made the revelation extraordinary.

“Maybe you have the peach fuzz autism too, Mom.”

“Peach fuzz?” I laughed. “It’s the ‘peaches and cream’ autism. And you are probably right.”

“Oh! I thought you were saying peach fuzz because it’s light and soft and hard to see.”

A large pile of peaches

Light and soft and hard to see

Peach Fuzz

The way my mind works, I pictured a peach with its soft, fuzzy outer skin covering the fruit’s flesh. This led to an exploration and possible conclusion to the peaches and cream conundrum. And it makes sense in relation to autism and hidden differences.

The peach’s fuzzy exterior has puzzled experts, with no definitive explanation for its presence. However, one prevailing theory suggests that this textured coating serves as an additional safeguard for the delicate peel, which is susceptible to premature rot.

Peach fuzz exists even though it is difficult to detect, and it exists for good reason.

When I shared my findings with my daughters, the younger one sighed. “Peach fuzz on the face, I meant.”

We’re still looking into it.

parent sitting behind an infant who is in a crawling position. Mom is looking at the baby and the baby is smiling broadly both facing the camera

Crawling – An Important Milestone in Human Brain Development

Parents of autistic children often share that their child did not crawl, and this factor is commonly underestimated. Those who have little ones who seem to simply sprout from scooting to standing to walking (even delayed) may feel as if the child has made great strides, but it’s important to recognize that crawling helps the brain develop. While scooting is absolutely adorable, crawling affects the brain in different ways. 

Baby in a scooting position

Scooting is fine but encourage crawling, too

Crawling as a Foundation for Cognitive and Motor Skills

Crawling plays a vital role in the early stages of human brain development, laying the foundation for various cognitive and motor skills. As infants begin to crawl, they engage in a complex process of sensory exploration and integration. This physical activity enhances the brain’s ability to create neural connections, facilitating the development of spatial awareness, hand-eye coordination, and proprioceptive skills.

Crawling also fosters the growth of the corpus callosum, a bundle of nerve fibers that connects the two brain hemispheres, promoting communication and information exchange between brain regions. The symmetrical and rhythmic movements involved in crawling have been shown to contribute significantly to the development of a well-connected and efficient brain architecture.

Studies on Crawling and Early Brain Development

Numerous studies have delved into the significance of crawling in early brain development. Research conducted by Karen Pape, a pediatric neurologist, highlights the essential role of crawling in forging neural connections and its influence on overall cognitive and motor development. A study published in the Journal of Neuroscience reveals that crawling babies exhibit enhanced spatial memory and a greater ability to perform tasks that require coordinated movement. Additionally, Neuroscientists such as Dr. John Ratey have explored how physical activities like crawling contribute to the release of brain-derived neurotrophic factor (BDNF), a protein essential for neuroplasticity and cognitive growth.

Encourage Crawling

Encouraging crawling in infants and providing them with safe and supportive environments to explore their motor skills can have far-reaching implications for their cognitive development. As demonstrated by scientific research, crawling sets the stage for improved brain connectivity, essential motor skills, and spatial awareness. And understanding the importance of crawling can guide parents, caregivers, and educators in fostering a child’s early development and providing them with a strong foundation for future learning and overall brain health.

Activities that Mimic Crawling

Activities that mimic crawling can help infants develop their motor skills, coordination, and strengthen their muscles. While infants may not be crawling independently yet, these activities can encourage them to practice the movements and prepare them for the milestone. Here are some activities you can try:

  1. Tummy Time: Place your baby on their tummy on a soft and safe surface. This position encourages them to lift their head and chest off the ground, strengthening their neck, back, and shoulder muscles – essential for crawling.
  2. Baby Plank: While your baby is on their tummy, gently support their upper body by holding their arms. This will help them practice the plank-like position that they will use when crawling.
  3. Rolling Games: Help your baby roll from their tummy to their back and vice versa. This motion helps them build core strength and improves their ability to change positions.
  4. Crawling Tunnel: Create a soft and safe crawling tunnel using cushions or blankets. Lay your baby on their tummy at one end and encourage them to move through it using their hands and knees.
  5. Crawl-and-Reach: Place toys just out of your baby’s reach while they are on their tummy. Encourage them to move towards the toys by crawling or scooting.
  6. Parent-Assisted Crawling: Sit on the floor and position your baby on your legs facing you. Gently help them move forward by holding their hands and guiding them through the crawling motion.
  7. Mirror Play: Place a baby-safe mirror in front of your baby while they are on their tummy. Babies are often fascinated by their reflections and may try to reach out to the “other baby,” promoting movement.
  8. Carpet Slide: Place your baby on a soft carpet or mat and gently pull them across the floor, allowing them to experience the crawling motion without using their own muscles.
  9. Crawling Race: If you have friends with babies around the same age, organize a mini-crawling race. Line up the babies and encourage them to crawl towards a fun toy or their parents waiting at the other end.

Remember, each baby develops at their own pace, and it’s essential to create a safe and supportive environment for them to explore and practice these movements. Always supervise your baby during these activities, and if you have any concerns about their development, consult with a pediatrician or child development specialist.

Resources:

  1. Pape, K. E. (2008). The role of early general movement assessments as predictors of cerebral palsy. The Neurologist, 14(6), 331-340.
  2. Adolph, K. E., & Berger, S. E. (2006). Motor development. Handbook of child psychology, 2, 161-213.
  3. Lobo, M. A., & Galloway, J. C. (2013). Crawling and walking infants elicit different verbal responses from mothers. Developmental science, 16(6), 894-905.
  4. Ratey, J. J. (2008). Spark: The Revolutionary New Science of Exercise and the Brain. Little, Brown Spark.
two empty coffee cups on a red background

Bereft of Coffee

While waiting for the coffee to finish brewing in the office kitchenette, my eyes fixated on the stream of coffee entering the carafe and the tranquil sounds it made in anticipation of the final surge of steam as the brewing finished.  This concentrated focus drowned out a number of elements that flooded the surroundings, flickering lights, multiple distant voices, phones ringing, and the general energy of movement within the maze of cubicles.

During the reverie, I saw a peripheral figure approaching to my left, and a soft, clear voice flowed into my ears, “Good morning! How are you?” and at that moment, I straightened and turned my entire torso toward the person asking the question, stopping like a machine that produced speech. I heard my own voice say, “I am bereft of coffee.” And all memory of the moments following would never gel in my mind because I could only fixate on my social ineptitude.

Bereft of coffee. Who says that? Did you even make eye contact?

Bereft

Bereft is not a word used often in everyday conversation. It’s a complex, haunting word that comes from bereave, a term of loss and mourning that communicates that something is lacking.

A graph showing the usage of the word bereft over the years with a slight uptick in 2019

Yes. I looked up the use of the word “bereft” over time. It really took a dip in the 1940s and I’ll probably try to find out why.

In the morning kitchenette interaction, the thing that was lacking was coffee, and the choice of the word bereft in this specific case seems a bit dramatic. The word may also communicate on some level that I really want to interact on your terms, but I just don’t know how. It takes a great deal of concentration and sometimes the words just pour out and I wish I could collect them and rearrange them into something, well, “normal.”

The coworker who kindly asked the question was likely to think, “Well, that was an unusual response,” and the moment would vanish along with the multiple mundane things that occur in a nondescript workday. But for me, this common office interaction became a source of shame that lingered for months. This wave of embarrassment was probably unnecessary but it is something that people on the autism spectrum face when they are aware of basic communication differences that can sometimes lead to misunderstanding.

Full Cup

When we have people who truly understand communication differences, we find that they often see these types of interactions insightful, and sometimes endearing. While lamenting to a trusted coworker about my perceived social awkwardness, she said how lovely it was that I was able to express such a deep love for coffee, and in turn, a deep appreciation for words. Bereft is a beautiful word that can express longing for acceptance, and even longing for something comforting, like a cup of coffee.

 

 

Image of a laptop with Autism Connection logo and text saying Virtual Workshop

How to Avoid Medication Mishaps

Carol Miller, RN/BSN, Director of Clinical Services at Achieva and Missy Knox, RN will talk about avoiding medication mishaps.

The presentation will:

  • Review questions to ask when starting a new medication
  • How to form good medication habits,
  • Medication storage, packaging, and disposal options
  • How to identify and react to medication emergencies

They will also briefly touch on genetic testing and how this may influence your medications, and there will be time for questions after the presentation.

This is a free virtual workshop, but registration is required. Register here.

Carnegie Science Center Logo

Miniature Railroad & Village® Sensory Friendly Tours

Join expert Miniature Railroad educators on a special behind-the-scenes tour through one of the Carnegie Science Center’s most popular exhibits! All tours will occur outside of regular museum hours. Designed for visitors with sensory sensitivities and/or other disabilities, these tours are personalized and free of crowds and loud noises. Each tour date has a very limited number of spots available, to maintain a welcoming, low-stimuli environment.

Tickets for this opportunity are free, regardless of Membership status, but require advance reservations for all members of your party. This is an all-ages appropriate event. General admission to the museum is not included, but can be purchased separately for the Tours that occur before museum open. To register, please use the buttons below, call 412-237-3400 or email [email protected]

photo of a drawing of two children standing alongside a third child in a wheelchair. It's a child's sketch and it's lying on a table surrounded by colored pencils and markers.

Let the Children Lead Us and Teach Us

One day a week I take myself to the office, the rest of the week I work remotely. The fluorescent lights in the office are not kind, and it takes me an hour to de-escalate myself once I get home. Sensory overload is real and it is hard. I wasn’t always aware of my sensory needs, and I still struggle with coping, but my son taught me how to identify obstacles in the environment. They were always there, and sensory overload affected me, but I am a product of the 80’s and 90’s growing up, and we certainly didn’t talk about sensory needs. You just dealt with it, or didn’t, but regardless you did it quietly.

Fast forward to having a child who was diagnosed with autism.

As a parent of a child on the spectrum, I had a large learning curve and I needed to maneuver it quickly. One day he didn’t have autism, and the next he did. Now I know, autism was always a part of him, this is what I mean by learning curve. In the beginning, I was circumventing the curve by doing everything others told me I needed to do to “cure the autism”. The focus was on changing him, not on creating a space where he could thrive. If he wasn’t in therapy or working on targeted skills, we were wasting precious time to “fix” him. False. False. False. 

Let me stop here and replace cure with cope and also say that speech, occupational, physical therapy, and skill building can happen in all the places all time. Children need space to be children and their adults need space to just be supportive adults. And while we’re replacing words in our vocabulary, let’s replace compliance with cooperation. But we can talk more about compliance vs cooperation in a future blog. 

We have so much to learn from people, especially children. Once I began focusing on coping, rather than fixing, everything changed. When I learned to listen to what my son was communicating but wasn’t verbally saying, everything changed. My son changed my entire view moving forward and made me realize I needed to reflect inward. The space I was trying to create for him to thrive, I learned, I also wanted. I didn’t want to just “get through it” anymore.  

Actively listening to my son smashed my rose colored glasses and showed me the beautiful world of diversity and inclusion. I learned how to identify and advocate for what I needed to be comfortable. I learned that asking questions and genuinely wanting to get to know about people and what is important to and for them, helps us all grow and create safe spaces. I learned that as I’ve shared how I feel or what I’ve experienced, many others say “me too!”, which creates a welcoming environment to share what is in their hearts and in their minds. I learned to meet people where they are. Even though I’m much older than my son, it’s been a life changing experience to learn together that neither of us needed fixing.  

This is a reminder to let the children lead us and teach us.

E.R. Heffel

close up of textured wall at Presley's Place at the Pittsburgh International Airport

Creating an Affordable Sensory-Friendly Room

A sensory-friendly room can be a crucial step toward providing comfort and relaxation for people with sensory sensitivities. However, the idea of taking on this task may seem overwhelming because of the high costs associated with it. Recently, Autism Connection of Pennsylvania visited our friends at Three Rivers Community Care, where CEO, Allison Broaddrick, demonstrated that many of the elements found in our region’s large, sensory-friendly spaces can be replicated on a smaller, more affordable scale. Examining larger projects in the Pittsburgh area is a source of inspiration.

Examples of Sensory-Friendly Areas

Autism Connection of Pennsylvania has seen innovative examples of areas that help people with sensory sensitivities since the Pittsburgh Cultural Trust brought sensory-friendly performances to our region back in 2013. One of the most outstanding endeavors is the sensory-friendly area at the Pittsburgh International Airport, Presley’s Place. This project motivated The Honorable Jennifer McCrady to initiate sensory friendly areas in the Family Division of the Allegheny County Courthouse.

Affordable Sensory-Friendly Rooms

First, a quick congratulations to Allison Broaddrick, for making the list of 30 Under 30 in the Pittsburgh Business Times. Her ingenuity and knack for problem-solving are among her greatest assets, and her use of inexpensive materials in creating a calming area at Three Rivers Community Care is a great model. The process began with addressing the specific needs that her friends, clients and associates expressed. From there, the team began putting ideas into motion.

Quick Tips for Inexpensive Sensory-Friendly Spaces

Choose the right color scheme: Soft pastels or muted shades of blue, green or lavender can help to create a calming atmosphere.

Manage lighting: Lighting can play a significant role in sensory experiences. Use soft lighting to create a relaxing environment. Avoid bright or fluorescent and flashing lights. Consider using dimmer switches or lampshades to help control the level of light.

Provide comfortable seating: Choose a comfortable chair or couch with soft, supportive cushions.

Incorporate soft textures: Use soft blankets, pillows, and plush toys to create a sensory-friendly atmosphere that is still texturally interesting.

Use soundproofing materials: Soundproofing materials can help to reduce outside noise, creating a quiet environment. Use foam panels or curtains to absorb sound.

Implement what works for for the person as an individual: Taking the lead from those who will benefit from the space is a critical first step. Look for elements that resonate with personally; it can be a favorite toy, activity, or sound.

Begin With The End In Mind

We can’t stress enough how very important it is to begin by listening to people who experience overwhelming sensory processing experiences. In each successful endeavor, people with lived expertise took active roles in the planning and development, and each project adjusts to feedback from different perspectives. The partnership between the Pittsburgh International Airport and Hayes Design Group Architects is a prime example because this collaboration began by bringing people who have sensory processing differences, autism, post-traumatic stress, and anxiety to the planning and development table at its inception.

Autism Connection of Pennsylvania continues to collaborate with the community in creating environments that are inclusive and accessible. Current projects include Accessibility in the Arts and the Frick Environmental Center Sensory Classroom. Time and time again, we find that many ideas are remarkably simple and can be inexpensive to replicate if we listen carefully and respond by bringing ideas to life.